Deliberate Methodical Change
With a quote from "Reflections on the Revolution in France" by Edmund Burke
A Deliberate, Methodical Change
By Jake Bair
All of us have weaknesses that we recognize, we are not now what we could and ought to be. Often we will see some glaring problem with our character, and are so repulsed that we decide to end that problem by some large effort of will immediately only to peter out over time and end up in the same spot, if not worse than before. A great physical example of this is when we see people make herculean efforts to lose 100 pounds in a few months only to gain all the weight back within a year because their efforts were not sustainable. But the same applies to other areas less visible. We think we play too many video games, we yell at our kids too much, we wish we could play an instrument as well as our neighbor, we wish our house were cleaner. There are certainly examples of success stories where people are able to do all of these things in one fell swoop. But far more prevalent are examples of people making amazing immediate progress, then burning out and falling back into old habits.
The same is true in social interactions. We see a problem in our church or school or local government and think, “This is a really stupid rule!” Then we break that rule without ever asking what its original purpose was and find too late that the people who made the rule or law were in the right.
Edmund Burke was a British politician during the American Revolution and during the first French Revolution. He was in a very rare club of people who were supportive of the American Revolution but predicted “The Terror” of the French Revolution well before the rampant executions started. Most people at the time thought the French were following the Americans’ example, but Burke saw that they were destroying the foundations of their government. In his book, “Reflections on the Revolution in France” he related an individual’s progress to that of government as follows:
“Prejudice renders a man’s virtue his habit, and not a series of unconnected acts. Through just prejudice his duty becomes a part of his nature. Your literary men and your politicians, and so do the whole clan of the enlightened among us, essentially differ in these points. They have no respect for the wisdom of others. But they pay it off, by a very full measure of confidence of their own. With them, it’s a sufficient motive to destroy an old scheme of things, because it is an old one. As to the new, they are in no sort of fear with regard to the duration of a building run up in haste, because duration is no object to those who think little or nothing has been done before their time, and who place all their hopes in discovery. They conceive very systematically, that all things which give perpetuity are mischievous. Therefore, they are at inexpiable war with all establishment. They think that government may vary like modes of dress, and with as little ill effect…
…we have consecrated the state that no man should approach to look into its defects or corruptions but with due caution. That he should never dream of beginning its reformation by its subversion. That he should approach to the faults of the state as to the wounds of a father, with pious awe, and trembling solicitude. By this wise prejudice, we are taught to look with horror on those children of their country who are prompt, rashly, to hack that aged parent to pieces and put him into the kettle of magicians in hopes that by their poisonous weeds and wild incantations they may regenerate the paternal constitution and renovate their father’s life.”
An individual who wants virtue to be his habit must set up walls and guideposts to slowly lead him to making his duty a part of his nature. If we jump into change too hastily, we risk beginning our reformation with our own subversion. We know this intuitively with some things; we know we can’t become as fit as Patrick Mahomes after one workout or as good at violin as Itzhak Perlman from one lesson. Yet we see the loving grandmother who is so patient and kind with both her children and grandchildren and we assume she was just like that when she had small children. We don’t see the 30 years of gradual change and failed attempts at parenting that led to the idyllic matron we see before us. Weaknesses almost never become strengths overnight. If we want them to become strengths at all, the most likely method of success is to be deliberate in our small but meaningful and sustainable steps to become who we want to be. Understanding the cause of the weakness, before we go to make huge changes.